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I AM in Iowa Adolescents Making Choices to Control Their Future Teen:Health, Relationship, Body and Sexuality
Oct 14

My Journey to Self-Acceptance

Posted By iamincontrol | October 14, 2014

smiling teenage girl
By Jingyuan

For a very long time, I used to think I was ugly, morbidly obese and a creature of the shadows – neither to be heard nor seen. I was two hundred and forty-two pounds at just seventeen years of age. Today, I feel very comfortable with my weight, but my smile serves not only to show my appreciation of myself and my body image, but also to hide the many scars and wounds I have had to endure for most of my life. I am beautiful, regardless of what other people think. I know and believe this to be true. Anyone out there who has been told that they are not attractive or pretty enough, simply because of their body image, their shape, their height or anything related to their body, should remember that they are beautiful.

I am an only child, so it did not take too much time before the evidence of my “impressive” appetite started to show. By the time I got into junior high, I was already overweight. It did not bother me at all, until one day a boy I liked called me morbid and ugly. It was during break, and everyone witnessed it, or at least I felt like everyone did. I felt my whole world crash and crumble below my feet. From that day on, my schoolmates seemed to look at me a bit longer and exchange messages in hushed tones. After a while, I resolved to keep to myself, avoiding public places and starving myself to fit into the Cinderella image that was seemingly the definition of beautiful.

But being pretty or beautiful has nothing to do with your body size. I have learned that how you feel about yourself inside is the most important thing, and it can either bring people towards you or keep them away. I have many friends now because I have learned that the mean words people say should not determine how I live or how I feel about myself. I am beautiful. Take that frown from your face and come out of your shell. Experience life as yourself and not what others want you to be.